waking up to our idols (a version of God made in our image)
I love stories where a character is seemingly "stuck" only to find, create, enter a turning point that leads to their freedom from an enslaved existence. Check out Menomena's Evil Bee - what resonates in you through the artful story?
As a community, we've been exploring the idea of "Suspended Space." We are a group consciously letting go of judgement and fear - in order to attempt to see everyone and everything as instruments of our transformation. As we do this - we hope to have open arms to each other (no matter who you are/I am) and see more of God in all of creation and in everyone.
This past sunday our conversation was around - Suspended Space to Unearth our Idols. A reading of Exodus 32 - helps us see that we create a version of God - that we might very well be lulled into sleep (see assembly line in the Evil Bee vid) believing our version or understanding of God is fully GOD. He's much less graspable than we can ever be okay with. In our effort to make God into something we can relate to - we idolize hime (we make versions of him that are only in part Him - if at all Him).
Where have we idolized God? - believing we can capture God in our own expectations, or the entitlement we feel (consider the American Dream), or in our need to have control over our life. Inherent in our expectations of God our sense of entitlement for the life we want and our obsession for control--we fashion God to perpetuate our life--as we sleep along, lulled by making God in our image.
True suspended space, as I understand it, makes room for us all to unearth these idols - see our idols as the death bringers they are - and find freedom (the image of the 2 bees flying into the sky to find a real flower and a real connection w/ each other) to a life alive with the Living One. Let's AWAKE!
“I don’t think it always seems like we have an actual, real, live, full relationship with God . . . God is the most profoundly alive, unfixable thing there is. A presence so enormous, so permeating, so thorough, that it’s mistaken for absence.” - Debbie Blue, From Stones to Living Word
is your faith making you a more beautiful person?
In our gathering tonight, we began talking about suspending space as a group - being willing to open ourselves to the hope that everyone and everything can be instruments of our own transformation. We spoke together about the postures of "protecting" God by our obsession with a boundaries focused faith vs. an openness - a humility to learn, wrestle, and acknowledge that even our best understanding is not full understanding. We examined, 'how we believe' vs.'what we believe'---asking which one of these we are most comfortable with in our current faith. We about a possible criteria for our faith as, 'Is your faith making you a more beautiful person?' All of these ideas came out of our watching the following interview with Peter Rollins.
We will continue to push ourselves toward a faith that is lived, open to everyone, beautiful, and immersed in wrestling with the mystery of God. Our conversation continues in these areas over the next several weeks in August. You are invited to join us, 5pm every Sunday.
Take a look, and share with us what resonates most with you.
http://www.vimeo.com/2752277longing to behold
Over the years, I've become increasingly aware of a very real tension of attempting to define God and feeling like I am losing God in some way the more I attempt to describe Him. At first I think it seemed like I was merely reacting against those who defined God in such a way that excluded others or used a belief system like a powerful weapon against those who disagreed. It was a reaction against these things--but it was more. It seemed that the more controlling reign I sought on my "doctrine" the more God became less God--and One in whom I needed to protect. Within Convergence, I have seen emerge a community who is willing to wrestle with letting God of a fine-tuned required language about God and embracing the mystery of God. It has been such a refreshing time to be a part of a community who is willing to leave questions unanswered, struggle openingly with highs and lows of life, and become increasingly aware that God is both known and unknowable---both the One in whom we can have all of our life wrapped up in and yet not have all the answers about life.
Tim Keel describes what I am attempting to express in words from his own journey (from his Leadership Journal article, Naked in the Pulpit). They have encouraged me many times over the years . . .
Comprehension is understanding; apprehension is beholding. Cognitive people seek comprehension; contemplative people look for apprehension. In our preaching we often seek to understand God, to use language to describe who or what God is. That kind of description can be deceptive. It can be a form of control.
We know from the Bible that any god we can control is no real god but an idol. Our preaching must reckon with the reality that Yahweh is shrouded, mysterious, and often inaccessible. How can we comprehend that?
Apprehension is simply stepping back and marveling at what it is we behold, even if we have no idea who it is or what is happening. For a scriptural reference, the psalms of lament are a good starting point, as is Job.
If the only kind of speech we use is speech that deals with comprehension, then we will only talk about that which we understand. As a preacher, I am invited to describe a reality that I am just beginning to get the hint of. That means being willing not to know, to stumble over language so I might tell a story. I'm not so interested in merely providing comprehension; I'm interested in describing reality, even if that leaves room for confusion.
We'll explore more of the implecations of making room in our life beyond comprehension to "apprehension is beholding" in the next several weeks of the Gathering (every Sunday 5pm) conversation.
awareness and it’s affect/effect [daily examen]
Tonight, in the Gathering, we will practice the Daily Examen. This has been an important practice in our pursuit of being more aware of God, of others, and our interior life. We have a pdf of the practice available in on our Resources page.
A few steps to follow to enter into the Daily Examen:
* Slow down your mind, and enter silence.
* Breathe deeply in and out. On every breath in, pray for God's nearness. On every breath out, pray for letting go of your life. (John 3:30)
* After a few moments, REWIND your day or week. Now scan through your interactions with people, words spoke, thoughts you thought, feelings you felt. Scan over moments with strangers, co-workers, with friends and family. Replay your actions, your work, your play, your moments alone. As you do, look for the "thin places."
Samir Selmanovic, in his book, It’s All Really About God, writes,
“Thin places are stopping places where we, for at least a moment, step into what lies beyond the doorway of the world limited to our five senses. These experiences confirm our hopes and bind us to our beliefs. Two worlds become one.”
* While examining your moments - don't force it - relax and prayerfully breath deep. this is not an exercise to find and share the most profound moment---it is an exercise in resting in God's nearness.
* After finding a moment to settle in on . . . consider the questions:
How is my Life Touched?
Is there an invitation here?
We are engaging the practice specifically to see where being AWARE of God and others and self is taking us. We are not meant for passivity - for boredom - but for creativity and life (see further thoughts from Matthew Fox on this). As a community, Convergence, and as individuals - How is the trajectory of our life influenced and resulting differently because of our AWARENESS of God?
We are asking the question within Convergence this way . . .
What affect (influence) is God having in our life? What effect (result) is it causing in the path of our lives?
the way before us: creativity or “death-bringing”
I picked up the book Creativity by Matthew Fox to pour over it a second time. His subtitle is "Where the Divine and Human Meet" - it's at this point of creativity, for Fox, that we've been made. I find the idea quite intriguing. Creativity---seeing life emerge in our way of living, in our expression, in our work, in our sons and daughters, that this is the essence of the ikon of God humanity carries.
He builds his case for creativity in the first chapter by stating what humanity is not (via negativa):
We are not consumers - for most of our existence humanity has been makers not consumers.
We are not addicts - we have exchanged our interior expression for external dictatorships.
We are not passive -
"It is not the essence of the human to be passive. We are players. We are actors on many stages. We initiate contacts, ideas, movements, inventions, babies, institutions, sport, exercise, relationships of all kinds. We are curious, we are yearning to wonder, we are longing to be amazed, we are eager to grow, to learn, to be excited, to be enthusiastic, to be expressive. In short, to be alive. Passivity is a sign of sickness, of weakness, of dying." Matthew Fox, Creativity
We are not boring - wonder, beauty, and life can be seen everywhere in us.
We need not be bored -
"If we are alive and interacting with all the marvel of daily existence, if we are learning how others, living and deceased, related to the marvel of existence, then we will not be bored. We will not be reduced to depression where we have no energy to begin new things." - Matthew Fox
We are not cogs in a machine - the modern era left us with the notion that the universe is a machine. Meaninglessness, numbness, isolation, coldness, sterility, and dysfunction choke out creativity.
We are not destroyers - We often choose to destroy, but this is a choice. Our imaginations are so powerful, we can either create or destroy.
"What is before us is the power of creativity--it is a life-and-death power. What is also before us is choice: It is a daily choice, an everyday choice, one that arises in all our relations from parenting to grandparenting, from work worlds to educational ones, from religion to economics, business, politics, and citizenship in all its forms. It affects what we eat and what we throw away; how we live and what we choose to say no to. This is the power of creativity. 'Creativity' may be the nearest one-word definition we possess for the essence of our humanity, for the true meaning of 'soul.'"
After reading Fox's thoughts - I can't help but ask myself - What affect/effect is awareness having in me/us? What is being birthed? What way of life is emerging beyond this life of addiction, consumption, boredom, and passivity?
Read Deuteronomy 30 - do you see this contrast of life and death - creativity or "death-bringing"?
How do you react to Fox's attempt to wake us up from the slumber that quiets creativity?
a bicycle dismantled . . . a life retreived
This past sunday was a Film&Dialogue format for The Gathering. We had the great opportunity to view Jitensha (Bicycle). It was a great conversation around the way all of us experience certain seasons of "dismantling". It's in these often slow downward descents that it seems our life is slipping through our fingers---unable to grasp and control anything. We talked about God being in those moments--not just waiting on the other side with wholeness for us. The ways we see God must not be limited to pleasant sunrises and brighter days. We also talked about the movement from isolation to connectedness. We find at the beginning of the story, Mamoru (main character), has completely cut himself off from everyone. And through the journey--his "life being retrieved" includes the awkward vulnerable inclusion of others in his life.
Here are a few of the questions that we worked through last Sunday. I encourage you to continue the conversation here . . .
"Dear Thief, Whoever you are just take the whole thing! I don't get it, this bit-by-bit business! It's all yours. - Mamoru"
*What is the significance of 'bit-by-bit' in both dismantling and retrieving life?
"This is the world in which you live...-God"
*why is this statement important even for us? what does the story speak about being present?
*when have you gone through a similar dismantling - desperation - retrieved process?
*why do you think God is seen in the dismantling or darkness of life?
*how do you see God in the journey or unfolding in his/our rebuilding process?
*how does a story like this give us hope and grace for ourselves and others? how does it reduce our tendency toward labeling/judging?
Blurring the Lines Between You and Me
Our conversation on Solidarity last week has really stuck with me since. Kathy and I watched the Chris Tse video again together and talked about some of the ideas he brought up in his slam. The primary thought that has seemed to confront me many times since our conversation is how easy it is to label and judge and hate when the object of those feelings and actions is far away (either geographically or just in one's consciousness). But when we are in relationship with that person, it is much more difficult to live and act and feel in those ways. It seems that for Jesus the lines between self and "the other" were blurred enough to connect and identify. "The fruit of the Sprit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control."
Last night I watched a documentary "Missionaries of Hate" on the growing target on homosexuals in Uganda. A long-running stigma against homosexuals was ramped up last year after several evangelical pastors from the US came in and spoke to local pastors and large groups warning them against the "gay agenda." The universally successful tactic of fear of the unknown proved to be an easy sell for these pastors, who terrified the Ugandans saying their children were the target of a well-organized plot to recruit them into that lifestyle and to use them in abusive ways. They, along with a popular local pastor, portrayed the most obscure, graphic acts as normative in that type of lifestyle, stirring up rage within the community and country.
Soon after the visit from the pastors/missionaries, the country introduced laws imposing life-sentence terms for first offenders and death by hanging for multiple offenders. Even if you merely know someone practicing homosexuality, you are subject to imprisonment for not reporting them within 48 hrs. This hatred and vitriol were countered by the personal interviews with a few homosexual Ugandans. These individuals were humble, gentle, and kind, not returning hatred for hatred. I wondered with whom Christ would identify himself in this chaos.
Later that night I saw a tweet from my favorite singer-songwriter Ryan Adams on the memorial service for Ronnie James Dio, heavy metal rocker for Black Sabbath and Dio. Throughout Dio's career, he was targeted by fundamentalist Christians as the "poster child" of devil worshipping hard rockers. I read on CNN, "Church Plans to Picket Rocker Dio's Memorial Service" that the vengeful group from Westboro Baptist Church (Topeka, KS) was going to picket his memorial service. As I read through the article, I paused on a statement from Dio's wife, Wendy, about the protest. "Ronnie hates prejudice and violence. We need to turn the other cheek on these people that only know how to hate someone they didn't know," she said. She (and I assume Ronnie) seem to get the idea of solidarity (or lack there of)...to "only know how to hate someone they [don't] know." Once again, I wondered with whom Jesus would identify?
Solidarity seems to be getting both more and less complicated all at the same time to me. But in the midst of the confusion, one thing is becoming more clear, that for me to change the way I view others I have to blur the sharply defined lines between myself and the other, and welcome her/him into my life. Because, to know someone changes the equation in how I choose to judge or bring harm to her/him. On top of that, my perspectives that have been formed over a lifetime on who is playing for which team (in/out, right/wrong, etc) are constantly being shaken. In the examples above, one set of groups is saying they represent the Christ, while the other groups who have been portrayed as enemies of God seem to be living out many of the values of the kingdom Christ initiated...love, patience, kindness, gentleness, forgiveness, peace, self-control?
exploring community within [practice]
DIRECTED SILENCE: exploring community within (inspired by a tilden edwards practice)
"Close your eyes and let your imagination take your through your body with a focus on its spacious and miraculous quality. Emphasizing the spaciousness can include a sense of openness of forms." From within to skin, head to toe, shoulders to fingers explore the boundaries of your body.
Now imagine the boundaried ends of your body to no longer be hard lines but shadings.
After several minutes, now imagine the shadings of your boundaries extending to the ones around you. Imagine the ones around you to extend to the streets, to those you'll encounter this week, both familiar and stranger, both those that love you and those who are enemies.
After a few more minutes, imagine the shadings of humanity to be extended to God--you and I are not God, but we are connected to the Creator and Sustainer of all life.
As we end, offer a prayer of gratitude for "the wonder of this interwoven community within and beyond."
a contemplative process: city of Lights
in continuation from the previous post, we are pairing the creative process with the contemplative process . . . inviting you, after "building the city of God" during the gathering tonight (5.2.2010) to "see the city of Lights" by engaging the contemplative practice described by Anthony De Mello. As a community, we've engaged this practice before - but invite you to take some time this week and go through the process of imaging God in the city.
City of Lights
(by ANTHONY DE MELLO in Sadhana)
- follow this link to more contemplative practices that have shaped convergence
I want you to imagine you are sitting on a top of a mountain that is overlooking a vast city. It is twilight, the sun has just set and you notice the lights coming on in the great city…watch them coming on until the whole city seems a lake of lights…You are sitting here all alone, gazing at this beautiful spectacle…What are you feeling?
After a while you hear footsteps behind you and you know they are the footsteps of a holy man who lives in those parts. He comes up to you and stands by your side. He looks at you gently and says just once sentence to you: “If you go down to the city tonight you will find God.” Having said this he turns around and walks away. No explanations. No time for questions…
You have a conviction that this man knows what he is talking about. What do you feel now? Do you feel like acting on his statement and going into the city? Or would you rather stay where you are?
Whatever your inclination, I want you now to go down to the city in search of God…what do you feel as you go down?…
You have now come to the outskirts of the city and you have decided where to go search for God and find him…Where do you decide to go? Please follow the dictates of your heart in choosing the place you go to. Don’t be guided of what you think you “ought” to do or go to where you think you “ought” to go. Just go where your heart tells you to go…
What happens to you when arrive at this place? What do you find there? What do you do there? What happens to you? Do you find God? In what way? Or are you disappointed? What do you do then? Do you choose to go somewhere else? Where? Or do you just stay where are you?
[pause + share after practicing]
a creative process: city of God
tonight we will engage in a creative experience to [examine] our hope for our city and to [imagine] our way of life in our city. As a community we have been considering the Great Story of God to be our story--the one that continues to unfold at present. So, if we picture the hope of God's restoration through the eyes of John, we see a city. As we consider the hope of God's restoration, not one future day, but pouring out all around us, what do we see?
In the exercise (tonight) we were inspired by this blog: http://blog.digitalorthodoxy.com/?p=1278
We tweaked it a bit for the gathering...
If you were asked to build a city for God, what would you build?
What games would people in this city play?
Where would people live?
Would there be fences?
Would there be churches?
What would schools look like?
Would their be margins in this city?
Would there be parks?
Where would people eat?
What would the buildings look like?
Would there be cars?
Would there be art?
Would the people need to work?
How would the people have fun?
share your thoughts . . . or pictures of what you build (coming soon)
Convergence is a community embracing restoration through awareness, hospitality, and solidarity.
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DURING THE FORTY...
OTHERS:
* Engaging Advent (Xmas 09)
* My Year in Review (Jan09)
* Awareness Retreat (Fall 09)
* Awaken Retreat (Spring 09)
* Metanoina: forty days (Lent) to face a fundamental shift
* Community Is . . .
Categories of Posts
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- COMMUNITY (9)
- HOSPITALITY (2)
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currently reading…
The Bible as Improv: Seeing and Living the Script in New Ways
Ron Martoia
The Orthodox Heretic: And Other Impossible Tales
Peter Rollins
Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening
Cynthia Bourgeault
Jesus Freak: Feeding Healing Raising the Dead
Sara Miles
The Voice New Testament
Thomas Nelson
Jesus Today: A Spirituality of Radical Freedom
Albert Nolan
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